i haven't really been on dreamwidth recently

mostly just haven't been feeling the need to be a part of it

and like. i looked over failfandomanon and stuff and. people don't like seeing me around. honestly deserved.

(ALSO TO CLEAR SOMETHING UP: I DID NOT LIE ABOUT BEING OVER 18 TO JOIN EXCHANGES. i have no idea where that came from but. (AT THE TIME OF ME BEING A MINOR SIGNING UP FOR EXCHANGES) juletide let minors join. asog let minors join. fandomgrowthexchange let minors join. the exchange anniversary exchange deleted my signup because i said i was a minor in it and i didnt re-sign up i just took the L like a normal person I WAS 18 WHEN I SIGNED UP FOR CANDY HEARTS AND ALL OTHER EXCHANGE SIGNUPS ARE AFTER THAT)

i know people said that like. fests were ok but i suppose their minds changed. or at least they didn't mean the fests here, or well failfandomanon is not a monolith and they all have different opinions regarding whether or not i should be beating myself up over what i did forever or just stay far away from BFE or maybe just take on some new identity or whatever the heck!!! (even if i did take on said new identity and. didn't repeat what i did and actually behaved there is a non-zero chance people would connect the new me to the old me anyways and paint me as even eviler. or at least thats what im scared of.)

yeah i know i cant win. i sound like the most self-pitying person on the planet right now im sure. no matter what i say im an evil person who honestly is better off in jail. 

sunset archive fear not i. did consider emailing the owner but like. none of melos friends ever want anything to do with me (rightfully so!!! i kinda suck as a person!! lets all agree on that!) so. also wont be joining squidgeworld either but i will let you all know they explicitly permit underage rpf as long as its archive-locked which... melo i hope you're at least a little pissed about that

so like. you can go join ladiesbingo and seasonsoffandom and generalpromptsbingo and everything now (except for one comm ill stay at ofc but just. just one comm. one thats not really a part of the BFE sphere yknow)

and also feel free to spread this link around btw!!! post it all over FFA so they know n ppl can comment under ur comment about like. how chibiusa would be better at this than me or whatever. i hope the thread that that quip about chibiusa that someone made while y'all were talking about me was fun. i like it when i have things to do with literally any positive contribution to the world. sorry if me posting this link in the servers sounds like an attention grab i just dont wanna take that gamble of nobody seeing this

anyways farewell!!! im not going to kill myself but for all intents and purposes you can pretend i did so you can laugh about it or fake sympathy or whathaveyou. and i know you're gonna quip about me coming back but jokes on you im not coming back outside of literally just that one comm

edit: holy hell failfandomanon was right i have bad impulse control. another reason why i should not be here. but alas failfandomanon should know... it is safe for you to join seasons of fandom/communal creators/other bfe events again. be free. dont let me haunt you

maybe i should write eugene noncon petplay for super_effucktive

hm

Tayio:

"… If Cass dies here… if we both die here… it'd be my fault, wouldn't it?"

"… Mom always said life was the most important thing… the only thing worth taking a life over is to save another…"

"… We're not gonna die here."

"… At the very least, I won't let Cass die!"

Quxi:

"Shut up!"

"Taking people's things… claiming it's for their own good…"

"… An object is only a symbol! It is by love for an object a person can express their love for another person, for a skill, a passion, anything…"

"… If you won't get that…"

"… We'll just have to beat it into you!"

Felis:

"… I've peaked. I'm nothing, now. My art's gone downhill…"

"… Not even ending up here, on this strange island's helped at all…"

"… But I can't just die now. There's still something left in me, isn't there?"

"… Let's find out what it is together, Cass."

Nicki:

"I... I'm not a lot!"

"I'm just a hyperactive girl who wishes she was as cool as Cass!"

"You're right that I'm not very much! I want to be someone, but I can't!"

"Maybe I'll never be cool! Maybe I'll never be the cool girl I want to be in my dreams!"

"… But maybe I'll be a new kind of cool! Maybe I'll be a kind of cool that I never expected to be!"

"… And that 'cool' starts with me amd Cass defeating you!"

(no Romeo quotes… i should think about what her quest is about lol)

Leslie:

"… Hating people for who they are…"

"… I never expected that of you! I thought- I thought you had a real reason to hate trans people …"

"… But it's just because they exist in a way you don't like? Life their lives outside of what they've been told to?!"

"What makes you any different from Rusty's parents?! What makes you any different from someone who hates lesbians?!"

"… Agh! Let's pummel her to the ground, Cass!"

Flowers: "… Weird, but I don't need to purify you- You think the Darkness is here to stay?! No, I'll get rid of it, just you see!"

Currents: "A bunch of boring scientists that can't even see how beautiful this world is- hold on, what are you cheering over-!?! Tell me what that thing is, I wanna know!… If you don't forget how to be fun, then being scientists is ok! Wanna hear what I know about kitty cats?!"

Jewels: "… You don't need to think so much about this! Everyone should just listen to me- I'm pure of heart! My queen said so!"

Spades: "Stop messing with me!! Why are you laughing?!"

Swords: "If it's done out of love, it can't be wrong!"

Storms: "Stop! I can purify the Darkness myself, so please, don't-!"

Tears: "… You don't need to do this anymore- I'll cleanse the world of the Darkness!"

Mirrors: "You're LYING! I'M the True Heir, not you!"

- specific characters -

Cure Sunshine: "I'll make sure they remember you too when they talk about me once I'm done!"

Trinity: "Evil imposter! I'll break these people free from your spell!"

Stormites: "… Those five girls look familiar…"

Mousey: "Spread the news of my pure heart far and wide, ok?"

Cyn: "You're studying? Tell me something fun you learned! Something cool, or maybe something about kitty cats, or bunnies- I like bunnies! Did you know the reason why anime has a lot of moon bunnies is because in Japan they think there's bunnies on the moon?"

… i wonder if i should go make a games comm like fandom-emmpire instead

we can play like. battleship but its called "guess what tropes i like" and you get points for writing crayonfic /hj

alternatively i could finally set up stickerfics and maybe put up a little event there too lol

im like. ben n maya PLEASE stay friends

they r my brotp. ben very much likes her a LOT (platonically) and i am. :3 i love them


edit: just finished it

i love them so much AAAAAAAAAAAA brotp of all time

what makes someone a good person? what makes someone a bad person?

which one am i closest too, i wonder.

i saw that the amazing digital circus is on netflix! maybe I'll watch it, it seems popular

cannot wait for season 3!

or maybe i should just catch up via the manga?